Medium Low

In addition to our *ahem* intellectual pursuits, several Medium Low contributors devote much of their leisure time to unreasonably difficult endurance events such as trans-Europe bike tours, RAMROD and Ironman Canada. Personally, I enjoy the process of planning and training for an event and observing how my body adapts and changes over time. However, the culture of recreational athletics, in particular the gym, never ceases to embarrass me. A regular topic of conversation at the Medium Low headquarters is the general ridiculousness of American culture, and I believe that the Range of Motion (ROM) exercise machine is about as excellent an example of ridiculousness that you’re likely to find. First of all, look at the thing. It’s, I don’t know how to describe it, a weird hybrid of some sort of bondage device and a Rube Goldberg-esque contraption. Even better is the workout plan—4 minutes per day! Evidently 4 minutes on the ROM provides the same benefit as up to 45 minutes of running, 45 minutes of weight training and 20 minutes of stretching. All for $14615. And to think of all that time I’ve wasted on long bike rides and runs.